How I stay strong

It's been a long time since my last blog entry but it's been a whirlwind the last few months between getting adjusted to Ryan's being gone, the new job, multiple roommate transitions, revamping a program, serving the unit, buying and renovating a home, Sammy having health issues, etc. So here goes what God placed on my heart to write last night:

It’s no secret that I feel like one of the most blessed people in the world to get to work with the kids I work with. I love picking them up from school and hearing how their days were. I love knowing that spending time at the coffee house will make all our days better no matter what happened before or will happen after (Sammy included).

Today the kids had a pretty intense and amusing nerf war. They moved furniture, made teams, created rules (more like I created rules), and one of the kids showed up looking like Rambo with tons of nerf guns from home on top of what we already have in the coffee house. Sammy was right in the middle of it all (he was off limits though) and the kids would take breaks to love on him as usual. Towards the end, one of the kids led everyone in putting the place back together, which I love. Another kid was going through some stuff so those that were left prayed for them as they went home to face whatever life was going to bring their way because that’s what its all about.

Afterwards as I was heading home and reflecting on how good the afternoon had been (I even got some e-mails taken care of in the middle of it all) I saw what looked like an indentation/tearing in Sammy’s eye. My heart sank as I tried to figure out what could have happened and I was picturing how careful they all were to protect him during the nerf war and trying to figure out what he possibly could have gotten in to. I called the vet and they agreed to let me bring him in even though it was almost time to close, thank God I work/live so close to our vet. They took him back and what felt like ions later the vet came out telling me not to do this to her again. She thought it was a tear too….until she put some iodine on it to see it better and it wiped away.

We don’t know what it was and they want me to give him drops for a few days since it irritated his eye (they called it an ulcer) but he’s okay. I was able to stay calm because my cup had been filled by the quality time with my kids, by watching them have more joy and grow because of our time together. I had many thoughts try to race through my head before I knew it would be okay and I was able to put them aside because I need to be strong for these kids and I do not take that calling lightly. I have to keep myself in check so good days like today can continue to happen and crossover into other things we do together and as individuals to make it through life as we grow closer to God.

I knew I could handle whatever the outcome because it is not by my strength alone but by God’s power, wisdom, and mercy that I can endure all things. God does not give us more than we can handle and we do not deserve how good we have it on our worst days. It’s hard to remember that sometimes, but God is good all the time. I just felt like I needed to share some perspective in case any of my friends are going through something today too. I cannot imagine going through life without praising God for the good and looking to His strength in the more challenging times. I don’t know what tomorrow will bring but there’s no need to worry about that today. Also, if you do not have something that brings you this kind of joy and purpose, please pray that God would guide you to it...the youth could always use some extra adults to love on them if you want to start there:)

Graduation Blessings

Between finishing up school and my internship, saying goodbye to Ryan as he headed to training, preparing for my trip to Spain, taking it all in on my amazing getaway with my best friend from high school, and then returning to volunteer/work fun, there hasn't been much time for posting lately, but I want to remember how special my graduation was so I am just going to skip past all that for now.

I was actually dreading my graduation festivities. I ended up skipping my VCU graduation because I was tired from trip and knew it would be emotional going without my family since Ryan was in training already and my parents were on a cruise with my Grandma (which they loved and I am so happy for them). I had friends offer to go with me and I knew I would have friends there but I think half the battle for an Army wife is figuring out where your limits are and I knew that would be too much too soon for me. But, my parents were back in town for my BTSR graduation and I knew it was supposed to be special, but was I ever surprised by how much so!

I got into town and was able to pick up my VCU diploma quickly and easily which was a welcome surprise. I got settled into our beautiful hotel room and headed over to graduation rehearsal. I saw my good friend and former neighbor Donna right away and everything else that is going on in the world just fell away being in the presence of one of the strongest most amazing people I know.
It was sooo nice to see some of my other friends from seminary and surprisingly fun. My parents got into town in time for the dinner and it was so beautiful. Next to the actual diploma, the highlight of graduating from seminary is receiving the servant's towel. This year they made the towel ceremony extra special by reading a paragraph the President wrote after receiving affirmations about the individual from faculty, staff, and other students. This is what he wrote for me:

"You are a strong, bold, go-getter disciple. Your profound sense of call is evident, as is your deep and abiding love for your family--and for God. You are an encourager and helper. This towel is a reminder of Jesus' attention to the simplest kindnesses of life. As you know, we are the hands and feet of the Savior. His ministry of goodness, kindness, and salvation lives through us. It lives through your ministry. Serve with gladness."

I cried when he shared the family part. I was missing Ryan and remembering all the times I drove up to help with Pop during my last year of seminary. I was also remembering the joy of my Tate Mondays my first year of seminary and will always treasure that precious time with him.

After the dinner we headed to pick Sammy up from his sweet dog sitter, a former youth, and then back to the hotel. It was Sammy's first time in the hotel so he was a little restless but otherwise we had fun reliving old times of the three of us in not quite as nice accommodations:)

Graduation was beautiful Saturday. It was wonderful to celebrate with old friends who showed up to support us and to really feel blessed by the community and staff who put together a truly moving ceremony. It was so nice to walk with two of my closest friends from seminary and to walk through and thank the faculty at the end.

After graduation I went to take a picture with one of my favorite professors from seminary and she gave me the biggest hug. She had just heard about Ryan's deployment and she was so sweet about it. I learned a lot about Christian tradition through her classes, but I learned more about loving my husband through the way she loved hers. He was very sick and she cared for him in such a graceful way during my time at seminary. Then she gave the most loving testimony about him and their time together in one of the most amazing memorial services I have ever been to. She loved him with everything she had and she cared for him in such a selfless way until the very end. Love bears all things. I am so grateful she shared this journey because it helped Ryan and I to learn not to take each other for granted and it gives me hope that we can weather whatever may come.
There is so much more to share but I am headed to mom and dad's to work on some projects for the unit's send off. I hope that you are all having a wonderful Memorial Day. God Bless our troops and all those who have served.

Special time with our parents

Have I ever mentioned how much we love our parents?! We are so blessed to have basically grown up with each others parents and so its like we have almost always had two sets of parents who we respect and love dearly. I pulled two of my favorite pictures with our parents from the vault as I share how they made the past week before Ryan left for training special.
Shown here at Ryan's commissioning, we celebrated Jeff's 61st birthday this week and Mother's Day with dinner at their place Wednesday night. I was so tired from finishing things up at school and the internship but it was such a nice dinner and it is hard to believe it will be one of the last like that for a while. Sammy was actually pretty well behaved too (he usually just begs to play in their awesome outside when we go over there) and seemed entertained by their new robot vacuum thing (too cute). It was so nice to be able to give Linda her annual Mother's Day family photo book. I think this was the best one yet and I wish I could share the pages on here but you'll just have to ask her to let you see it the next time you are at her place:) Jeff is so hard to buy for but we gave him this book that Ryan had highly recommended for him to read so that he and Ryan can both read the same thing and have a better picture of what is going on where Ry will be serving.
I always loved this pic from our wedding. I wish Ry were in it but I am so thankful his Aunt Denise captured this of the original 3. My parents have been incredible in showing their support for us at this time. Friday night they treated us to Outback carry out since they were going there for dinner. It was a real treat for the homebody who wanted something special before resigning to MRE's and Army cooks. Saturday after I left Ry's unit I picked up lunch for Hillary and I to celebrate Mother's Day with mom and it was fun watching It's Complicated and relaxing together. Sammy spent the whole day with Grammy as his Mother's Day gift which was nice for me since I had a pretty full day. Yesterday we came back for lunch as almost always after a beautiful service at church and ended up making an afternoon of it. I have had UP for a few weeks from Netflix but we have been too busy to watch it so I put it on while I prepared lunch and we all got sucked in. It was a really sweet movie and of course we loved that the dog had a lot of similarities to little love. It was so nice to have all three of us plus Samson on the couch and to enjoy yummy lunch and ice cream after together. I don't know what I would do at this time without them and I am so thankful we get to spend so much time together. We definitely recommend this movie as a way to rethink priorities and relationships. It's not your typical cartoon movie.
So....Happy (belated) Mother's Day to you all! We are both so thankful for our moms and how much they have taught us and sacrificed for us over the years. I hope that you all found a way to make the day special and prayers for all of you for whom the day may be a difficult one.

19.5 years later

Applause went up after the final presentation last night and it carried on out into the parking lot. I am thrilled to be done with classes, papers, tests, and all the late nights and weekends I could have been doing more fun things. I am also sad I won't get to see my friends every week and won't get to learn from some really great professors anymore. Talk about some mixed emotions.

I am excited this means I am one step closer to getting a real job and that I survived what has seemed like a really long journey. At times I thought I was going to burn out but I really feel happy that I finished as strong as I did. I am so thankful Ryan and I decided I should take off of work during the school year for this final stretch. There is no way I could have managed that with my internships and ever spent quality time with him. I am so thankful to have been blessed with some really great groups in school too. Group work can be tough and especially when you have a group in all of your classes right til the end. We worked together so nicely though and definitely accomplished our girls. I was dreading research but I loved my group and will definitely be in withdrawals now that I won't be getting together with them at least once a week. I am looking forward to getting together with them just for fun though.

Yesterday was bittersweet, but I am all too aware of how painful it will be to drive away from the elementary school on Thursday and how I just might cry through my entire goodbye lunch with my supervisor. I always get attached to the kids I work with, but these kids really got to me. I know they will be okay and I will be okay and I am so thankful for what God did with our time together. It will still hurt though.

I am thankful Ryan and I both have off Friday to process it all before the unit leaves for training Saturday morning. I know I will need that and I am so thankful I will have it. For now, I am enjoying a day to get things done and regroup so I can be as strong as I can be at my last two days of my internship.

19.5 years in the making I am finally done with school. Wow, God is good! I cannot wait to get my MSW and MDiv in my hands and on my wall!

That was some party!!!

It would be an understatement to say that we were really excited to celebrate my graduations and Ryan's send off with family and friends. We had 83 people come show their love and support and we could not be more grateful for that. It was definitely an incredible party! I wish I could post all of my pictures from the party on here but I tried to choose the best. You can catch more of the pictures on facebook and I will post them to our picture site too. We are especially thankful to the people who traveled from PA, SC, and other parts of VA for the party.
This was the first thing we saw when we pulled up. How cool is this?! My Dad created a model so people could see what Ryan's unit will be doing over there.
They build bridges and no one will be falling over (some glue might have helped out the plastic dudes). We were so surprised by the way my parents and our other family and friends outdid themselves with speeches, fireworks, a presentation of service flags, great food, and company, etc etc etc.
Ryan's best friend from the unit and his Platoon Sergeant were able to make it. They got to help set off the fireworks and it was nice to hang out with their lovely wives too.
Now if that isn't a happy face I don't know what is:) The fireworks were a hit for everyone but the babies and Sammy.
I probably shouldn't, but I love how it looks like live fire coming out of the helicopter. At least the explosion is on the enemy's side and not ours, but hopefully there won't be any of that over there.
Ryan's parents look so happy in this picture. I am so glad they had a good time and were able to enjoy themselves.
Tate got the first piece of cake and Uncle Ryan let him have whichever piece he wanted, which was in the middle (of course)...too cute!
Carter may be my photographer's assistant one day for as much as he tries to get my camera:) Love this smile.
We didn't expect gifts since we had asked people to make or bring donations for the Wounded and Deployed Soldiers. We are so happy to hear that some people donated to the Wounded Warriors Project and we have three nice size bags to take to the military outreach meeting at church tonight. We were also really blessed by several beautiful arrangements of flowers (two pictured here) and Susan brought me to tears with her gift. It was a purse that was her husband's godmothers and she felt it was only fitting that Tate's godmother have it. I love that I am now a part of three generations of US Army Corps of Engineer officer's wives. I can't wait to use it at the next Dining In when they all come home and I have the perfect gold dress to wear with it that I wore at my Senior Dinner Dance in college.
I didn't get a chance to get a good picture of my parents at the party but we went to put the alcohol away and pick up the donations on Sunday and we had to get a picture in front of these beautiful blooms. We never intended for them to take over the party but they did such a wonderful job and I am so glad they had fun with it. Special thanks are due to Diana, Hillary, Tawnya, Kelly, Sierra, Jeff, and Linda for your help as well! It was really nice to be able to come enjoy the party and not be exhausted from prep because with what my week had looked like with school and the internship that's what would have happened.

What meant the most about the party was to be reminded of all of the support Ryan and I have. In the next year or so we are going to need prayers, people to talk to, fun escapes from reality for me, and backup in case things don't go according to plan. We were surrounded by a really strong reminder of that support on Saturday night and we feel so blessed by that.

Congrats Mr & Mrs Sabo!

Laura and Dave's wedding was so beautiful! Both the bride and groom were glowing and everything was just so nice. It was short and sweet and so meaningful. It was most likely (you never know) the last wedding before Ryan leaves and that made it extra special to me because I feel like Ryan and I renew our vows and remember what our marriage is about each time we go to a wedding. Of course our party clashed with their reception time but to me the ceremony is the most special part of a wedding. I know most people thing that is weird but I just think there is something amazing about seeing two people commit their lives to each other. I can't wait to catch up with Laura after her honeymoon now that both of our lives will hopefully be a bit calmer. Congrats Laura and Dave!

Party Time!

I had so much fun at Costco with mom Thursday night. We filled up two carts with lots of yummy things for all the people who said they are coming to the party. My list is at about 80 right now and not that it's about the numbers, but it means soooo much to know that people care enough to take the time to celebrate with us. This is an exciting time and an emotional time. I have waited to graduate for so long but saying goodbye to the students at my internship and to friends and the program I have known is harder than I had anticipated. We are both happy that Ryan will finally be able to get over to the sandbox where he feels called to serve, but a year is a long time to be a part. We know God will provide in both situations and we are so thankful to be at this point in our lives and to know that things we had waited for (a full time job for me in a career I want, a deployment under his belt, a house, a baby, etc.) are not all that far away.

Today I am finishing up some of the party prep, not that I have that much since some of our friends and family have decided to take over (props to my mom and dad for coordinating all of this). Then we are headed to a friends wedding and then we finally get to see all of the surprises they have cooked up. We are just thrilled to get to see so many of our loved ones today. Here is to praying for safe travels for all and a wonderful time had by all.